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Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Data Anal

That was the title one of my MBA teammates' recent emails. I couldn't bring myself to respond to it because it brought to mind so many interesting images. There was no way I was going to be able to say anything serious.

The thing is, that's kinda how it feels.

Spreadsheets are a lot of fun. Analyzing business data is fun. Data anal is what all the cool kids are doing now. Get with it, people.

Some things in my real life have been decided, pending other, very small factors. These things will be massively huge in my work/writing life, but most importantly it will be huge for my family life. In a good way. I hope. I will, of course, let you all know as soon as I can.

No, I don't have a record/publishing/film-making deal, but there are more subtle, delicate ways of measuring happiness and I hope that these big, decided things will go a long way toward a measure of happiness.

It's impossible not to put yourself in your writing. No matter how hard you try, you keep sneaking back in. This one time, when I was three, I was playing out in the yard and my mom went inside to answer the phone and just then a small bird landed in my yard. I wanted to touch it because I'd never been that close to a bird before. I wanted to feel what that felt like, to touch the untouchable. I walked toward the bird, but it hopped away. I chased after it, passed one house, then another, then another. The bird wouldn't fly. It couldn't fly. I reached out to hold it in my hand. Then I heard my mom, and she was yelling, and then her hands were on me, dragging me away from the bird. I reached out to touch it, but I couldn't; the strength of my mom was too much. She hugged me tight and she scolded me to never leave out of her sight again. Never again. I looked over my shoulder and the bird was gone. I was very sad.

My mom spanked me, to show me how serious this all was. I believed her.

When you chase after something really hard, your head bent down in the striving, sometimes, when you look back up, you can be surprised at just how far you've come.