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Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Little Crow's Eye View

Yo Gabba Gabba!

I'm sorry to do that to y'all right out the gate but I figured that little mindbender of a clip can do more to introduce you to my little corner of this blog than some dumb-magumb "My name is..." post.*

A few important details that you can glean from the preceding doozy:

Firstly, I'm one adorable little man, ain't I? And I can beat all y'alls babies in a dance off any day. Come wit' it.

Secondly, my parents** have no qualms about bending the norms of American society as it relates to Child Exploitation especially when it comes to entertainment. Seriously guys, you didn't even wait 3 months to become stage parents.

And lastly, DT has a seriously unhealthy fascination with the creepily psychotropic sesame-street-cum-futuristic-dance-competition show Yo Gabba Gabba. For the uninitiated this show is one of the most screwed up things I've ever seen in my life.***

But I digress. Yo Gabba Gabba. So, yeah, like from what I can gather apparently a homosexual clown in a multi-colored spandex suit and afro like hangs out with monster toys and hosts bizarre future-dance-offs between children, who are obviously blown on amphetamines, and the whole thing is like in the name of education. Apparently. From what I can gather. But I'm gonna tell you, after 3 weeks of watching this mushroom trip of a show, I honestly haven't understood a single f-ing word that clown or his monster friends have said to me except Yo Gabba Gabba. Yo Gabba Gabba. What does that even mean!? Ahhhhhh! If I'm supposed to be learning something from this I'm not sure what it is, unless of course it's to stay the heck away from clowns with multi-colored afros carrying boomboxes filled with singing, dancing monsters.

Because they'll make you dance too.

If any of you would like to actually check this stuff out then here's a link: Yo Gabba Gabba.

Be warned, though, this show is apparently highly addictive to adult males between the ages of 21-30, so if you have one if those in your house make sure to poop your diaper or throw up right before it comes on to save your household the embarrassment of an adult watching a kids' show.

So, anyway, that's what you need to know about my little section of this blog for now. To recap:

1.) I'm hot and a great dancer.
2.) My rents are shameless.
3.) Yo Gabba Gabba is really messed up.


*But here are the details anyway: My name is Collins and I'm 3 1/2 months old and DT gave me this slice of his blog to chat about what it's like to be his kid^. I will be popping up periodically, whenever I get the chance, to update you on the life and times of the littlest Crow.
^Further proof of what an arrogant, self-centered bizarro-bags he is.
**who will be herein referred to as Moms and Daddy T, or M and DT for short.
***which has admittedly only been about 3 months so there isn't much that doesn't blow my mind right now. I mean, just the other day I realized those white blobs that keep scratching my face are my hands. My hands! Talk about a mindf**k.